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As a homosexual man of British-Caribbean decent, I have struggled my entire life to satisfy the expectations of the black community, while still staying true to my gay self. Growing up I often questioned my sexuality; although I recognised and accepted my attraction to men, I knew from a young age, that there would come a time when my parents would discover I was gay, and that this would be a significant and extremely difficult moment in my life. What I knew of gay culture, growing up, came from homosexual characters featured in British television sitcoms. I had nothing in common with the gay men represented in mainstream media. I think that black men especially, have always felt the need to act manly, dominant and sometimes even, aggressive. Maybe this is down to a long history of mistreatment and repression; maybe we feel there is a need to assert our strength and authority in a world that has constantly tried to pit us as unequal.
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We had about twenty minutes before he had to leave for the airport. The image I had conjured of the thirty-two-year-old currently en route to my front door from our meager interaction on Grindr was as telling as a police report: an assumed age, height, and weight, as well as one scrupulously selected profile picture. And often enough, the photo too ended up a rough sketch. This was last summer when I had just turned twenty-two, fresh off the boat from flirting with my first serious relationship.
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My experience as a gay, black man

Rob Waltman tried to tell his partner, Peter Dovak, he looked fine. Peter Dovak. Photo: Peter Dovak via Rob Waltman.
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You don't know RJ Berger just yet, but give it time, you will. A total nerd, a complete dweeb and you guessed it, an absolute dork, RJ is a high school student stuck firmly in the lower level of the social hierarchy. But he does have one thing going for him: a giant penis.
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